Tuesday, October 28

that thing's gotta hemi

Lots of people, including probably you if you're reading this, like to use their blogs as a place to voice their current gripe. Guess what? My turn. I'm very, very sick of car companies trying to sell me on features they claim their cars/trucks/suvs possess, which do not impart any benefits as far as I (the average car/truck/suv owner) know. Examples: some trucks have 'hemis'. Now, as far as I know, so does my car. It probably doesn't, but if it did, why would that be better? It seems, from the commercials, that it might have something to do with pickup. But does it? I have no idea. Is my car 'trail-rated', as evidently all Jeeps are? I don't know. What does that mean? I mean, my car would probably fit on a bike trail better than most Jeeps, does that mean it's also 'trail-rated'? Additionally, I believe there is some truck where the thingy are welded to the outside parts, or some such thing. As opposed to what? And again, why is this something that a) is important or even b) I want? It's clear that advertising is usually flawed, but I was under the impression that the feature/benefit relationship was fairly understood as a good way to sell things. For instance, this new food product has more x, it is therefore tastier than before. Feature-more x, benefit-tastier. Easy. Or: cleaning product is now available in disposible wipes, instead of you needing rags. Feature - wipes, benefit - convenience. See? I'm a savvy consumer. I don't even need the benefit completely spelled out for me. But I need to understand that there is a benefit, or I'm not interested and I assume your company thinks that I'm dumb enough buy into jargon and catch phrases. Oh.... damn... most people are. F-ing lowest-common-denominator. I hate them.


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