Saturday, June 26

I love power boat noise

Ok... that's a lie. But it is good to be home. Really, really good.
For those of you who've missed the story, I nearly didn't make it (home, that is). You see... I was detained in Chicago by immigration. Despite the fact that I wasn't wearing jeans, I still say that I look pretty damn American. Way more than all of the other people that were sitting in the holding pen with me. Ok, it was more of a waiting room, only with bleacher-type benches instead of comfy chairs, but there weren't bars or anything. Just the cast of Reno 911 to keep us all in check. After answering a ridiculous amount of questions regarding my lack of personal ink, I was eventually freed to go by Captain Gomer Pile... the guy looked not unlike a taller version of Anthony Edwards from his Revenge of the Nerds days. He referred to a Chinese gentleman and I as "the peeps" when chatting with Dumb (I'm assigning my guy the title of Dumber) on his very fancy walkie-talkie. Seriously, they were like those damn mall security guards who got the job because they really, really wanted to be cops, but somehow never made it through 10th grade. Except that these guys actually have a significant amount of power, especially in this post 9-11 world, and I was terrified. Or mortified. One of the two. More freaked out than I was when I was stranded on the Chinese boarder, and I feel like that's saying a lot. Anywho, it was eventually determined that I was not a hardened criminal or enemy of the state, and I was free to leave. I figured I had better make my way toward the gate to catch the flight to Appleton, but that was just silly cuz, of course, the flight was delayed. As the flight attendant said as we finally touched down in "beautiful Appleton" (she actually said that, I shit you not): When you have time to spare, fly O'Hare! You gotta love that kind of wit.
It is now Saturday, as you no doubt inferred by the time/date stamp, and I am home and recovering from having my internal clock all messed up. Major headache, tummy isn't right, and the sleeping isn't quite on, yet, but I'm doing ok. Have I mentioned that I'm freezing? I just turned on the space heater. FREEZING. Isn't summer supposed to be kicking in soon?? WTF? In other news... I haven't got any. I'm tired. I finished Lyda's newest book. It's on my must-read list, as are her three previous books. Excellent, all. And I'm not just saying that cuz she's a fan of the dummo.

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